Are You Hospitable? | Az oszlop

God our Father is kind, good and merciful—all characteristics we must develop to inherit eternal life. One of the most satisfying ways we do this is through entertaining guests or sharing a meal.

Members of God’s Church have always been known for “breaking bread.” In other words, being hospitable!

The early New Testament Church understood the value of fellowship. They realized Christ added to the Church daily, often through the example they set by being warm and friendly toward all.

After receiving the Holy Spirit, brethren understood the importance of the example of fellowship. They realized it was a large part of being “…witnesses unto [Jesus Christ] both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth” (Acts 1:8). They continued “daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart” (Acts 2:46).

This is still true today.

Abraham’s Example

The opportunity to entertain guests is a most rewarding and enjoyable experience. As Christians, we should especially enjoy this opportunity. Notice: “Be kindly affectionate one to another with brotherly love; in honor preferring one another…Distributing to the necessity of saints; given to hospitality” (Rom. 12:10, 13).

Abraham, the father of the faithful (Gal. 3:9), set an example of hospitality. “And the Lord appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day; and he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw them, he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground, and said, My Lord, if now I have found favor in your sight, pass not away, I pray you, from your servant: let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree: and I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort you your hearts; after that you shall pass on: for therefore are you come to your servant. And they said, So do, as you have said. And Abraham hastened into the tent to Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead it, and make cakes upon the hearth. And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetched a calf tender and good, and gave it unto a young man; and he hastened to dress it. And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set it before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat” (Gen. 18:1-8).

Notice Abraham’s reaction to these visitors: (1) he ran to greet them; (2) he invited them to stay; (3) he made them comfortable; (4) he offered them a meal and prepared it urgently; (5) he willingly shared what he had; (6) he served his guests.

Put Away the Self

As shown by Abraham’s example, hospitality has multiple elements. Rather than complain or object as the three strangers approached his tent, he enthusiastically “ran to meet them.” Abraham applied what the apostle Peter many years later admonished brethren to do: “Use hospitality one to another without grudging” (I Pet. 4:9). The word “grudging” in Greek is goggusmos, meaning to murmur or grumble.

Imagine Abraham reclining comfortably under the shade of his tent. As he saw men in the distance, how easy would it have been for him to have selfishly said, “What do these people want and why are they coming here?”

If he was reluctant to entertain these men—if his thoughts focused inward rather than on serving others—he would have missed out entertaining God and would have suffered the consequences of that decision.

Abraham understood the importance of welcoming visitors long before Paul taught it in the book of Hebrews. “Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares” (Heb. 13:2). As it turned out, Abraham entertained the Word and two angels.

Further examination of verse 2 reveals another lesson. The Greek word for “forgetful” is epilanthanomai, meaning “to lose out of mind; by implication to neglect.” But what do we neglect? The word here for entertain is philonexia, which Thayer’s Lexicon defines as “love to strangers, hospitality.” In short, we are not to neglect hospitality.

Serve Others

Jesus taught His disciples, “For who is greater, he that sits at meat, or he that serves? Is not he that sits at meat? But I am among you as He that serves” (Luke 22:27). As Christ’s disciples, we too must be people who serve.

Fellowshipping through entertaining guests is an opportunity to serve brethren. As we communicate with others who have the Holy Spirit, we also fellowship with the Father and Christ (I John 1:3).

A minister is required to be “given to hospitality” (I Tim. 3:2) and to be “a lover of hospitality” (Titus 1:8). Even though this is among the qualifications for the ministry, every member of God’s Church should exhibit this characteristic.

Abraham’s example demonstrated that he loved people. Notice how he ran to invite them to his home, made them comfortable, offered them refreshments and prepared a scrumptious meal. He personally served his guests and did exactly as Christ commanded His disciples.

As Christians, we must also love the brethren. “We know that we have passed from death unto life, because we love the brethren. He that loves not his brother abides in death” (I John 3:14).

Welcoming Others

Being a successful host requires some planning. If you have never invited people to your home or have been reluctant to do so, now is the time to make that change!

Before entertaining, one of the first things you should do is decide what type of activity you want to invite guests to attend. Will it be a formal or casual dinner? A barbecue? Or are you inviting a group over just for refreshments and fellowship? Of course, these are all great ways to get to know and spend time with brethren. None of these activities need to be expensive if planned properly.

Consider these points:

Decide how large the activity should be. This depends on the size of your home. Usually, six to eight people is a manageable number. Hosting a smaller group ensures that you will be able to speak with everyone.
Always be available when guests arrive. If married, one spouse should greet the guests. Be warm and gracious. Do not be stiff. A smile goes a long way!
Do not be afraid to host a potluck, in which others bring dishes to share. This offers a diversity of food. It is also a great way to spread the workload involved in cooking.
Try to have most of the food ready before your guests arrive. This will give you time to spend with them before dinner. Food is usually served within an hour of your guests’ arrival.
Arrange seating so quieter guests sits next more talkative ones to help keep conversation flowing.
It is not proper to ask guests to remove their shoes upon entering your home as it could make them uncomfortable (an exception to this rule is if you provide them nice slippers).
Consider those you have invited. Someone who is elderly, has food allergies, or even young children, all have different needs that you must accommodate. Be willing to make extra preparations ahead of time that will ensure a successful activity.

Invite those who do not normally spend time with one another. Hosting is an easy and enjoyable way to develop closer and meaningful relationships with a variety of people. Also, it is a way to serve and give to those who may not otherwise be invited elsewhere. Jesus Christ taught the following, “Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as you have done it unto one of the least of these My brethren, you have done it unto Me” (Matt. 25:40).

Beware of the tendency to invite only your close friends. Remember, “Hearken, my beloved brethren, has not God chosen the poor of this world rich in faith, and heirs of the kingdom which He has promised to them that love Him? But you have despised the poor. Do not rich men oppress you, and draw you before the judgment seats? Do not they blaspheme that worthy name by the which you are called? If you fulfill the royal law according to the scripture, You shall love your neighbor as yourself, you do well: but if you have respect to persons, you commit sin, and are convinced of the law as transgressors” (Jms. 2:5-9).

None of us want to be guilty of being a respecter of persons nor should we exclude any of our brethren, regardless of their circumstances.

To the Guest…

Guests can easily slip into the attitude of, “I’m the guest; I have no responsibility.” But as a good guest, you should never think this way. Instead, be mindful of the following:

Make it easy on your host. Respond to an invitation before the date of the occasion as this helps he or she plan.
Do not be afraid to ask if you can contribute to the meal.
If you bring a bottle of wine as a gift, do not expect it to be served. The host may have selected a different wine to accompany the meal. Also, whatever you bring to an invited occasion, do not expect to take it back.
Do your part to strike up conversations with other guests. As Proverbs 15:23 states, “A man has joy by the answer of his mouth: and a word spoken in due season, how good is it.”
After the meal, you may want to ask the host if they need help clearing the table. If you receive a “no, thank you” take it graciously and do not insist.
Steer clear of controversial subjects that cause people to take sides.
It is good etiquette to arrive a few minutes after the designated time. This allows the host to finish any last-minute preparations.

Cordial Goodbye

In today’s society, it is customary to accompany guests only to the front door of the house to say goodbye. Not so in Abraham’s time. “And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way” (Gen. 18:16). This same custom was still followed in the time of the New Testament Church, where the Ephesian brethren accompanied Paul to the ship to see him off (Acts 20:38).

Back in the early years of the Philadelphian age, when leaving a member’s home after an evening of fellowship, we would walk to our car accompanied by our host. Our conversation would often—even usually—continue for another 20 to 30 minutes by the car. It exemplified the first-century Church, which could not get enough of each other’s company or learning about the way in which each person was called into the truth. “And they continued steadfastly in the apostles’ doctrine and fellowship, and in breaking of bread, and in prayers” (Acts 2:42).

Being a host or a guest gives us the opportunity to develop the godly characteristics of kindness, goodness and mercy. Being hospitable creates in us a willingness to serve and love people, and unifies the Church.

If you put these principles of hospitality into practice, you will help to build a more unified Church of God and fulfill Psalm 133:1: “Behold, how good and how pleasant it is for brethren to dwell together in unity”!