Are You a Critic?

Revelation 6 describes a vision of four horsemen riding in the runup to the Day of the Lord. These figures bring bloody warfare, brutal famine and crippling disease. Along with attacks from wild beasts, they kill one-fourth of all mankind (vs. 1-8).

What does this have to do with being critical?

Called the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse in popular culture, these riders appear as literary references in novels and news articles, the subject of metal songs, and the villains in TV shows—always bringing doom and destruction.

The Gottman Institute, which specializes in relationship counseling, uses the Four Horsemen as a metaphor for devastating interpersonal problems. The four are criticism, contempt, defensiveness and stonewalling. When these peak, marriages end, friends split and employees flame out at work.

Yet it all starts with criticism.

Even without the truths of the Bible, these clinical psychologists know how destructive a critical attitude is to relationships. It is the seed that sets people down a terrible path that can lead to unchangeable outcomes.

The stakes are even higher for Christians. If we fully give in to criticizing others, Church leaders, or even God Himself, it will also bring doom and destruction. And the results can be eternal.

Luke 6:37 contains a stark warning from Jesus Christ: “Judge not, and you shall not be judged: condemn not, and you shall not be condemned: forgive, and you shall be forgiven.”

Judging others means finding fault with them. It is the culmination of a negative critical attitude filled with accusations and personal attacks. This verse shows that those who do this will be judged by God in the same manner. Hebrews 10:31 applies: “It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.”

Yet avoiding this deadly mindset is harder now than ever. Negative opinions fill YouTube comments, Yelp reviews, and conversations alongside online news articles. You hear it from co-workers and mudslinging among political opponents. Critical attitudes saturate this world.

How can you guard yourself from this ever-present attitude?

Two Sides

Realize that not all criticism is bad. Feedback can be positive and constructive. It is all about attitude.

If you discuss yesterday’s football game with a friend and analyze the different plays—what worked well and where the team could have done better—that is criticism. It is fine if done without personally attacking those involved. The same goes for analyzing a movie you watched, looking for ways to improve a new food recipe with your spouse, or exploring how to make things more efficient at work.

Bringing positive criticism to individuals is also fine. But it must be done wisely—and with kindness, love and respect.

The other side of the coin is being judgmental and accusatory. While no one verse says, “Thou shalt not be negatively critical,” God’s feelings can clearly be seen when looking at attitudes that stem from sinful criticism.

Proverbs 6 states: “These six things does the Lord hate: yes, seven are an abomination unto Him: a proud look, a lying tongue, and hands that shed innocent blood, a heart that devises wicked imaginations, feet that be swift in running to mischief, a false witness that speaks lies, and he that sows discord among brethren” (vs. 16-19).

These abominations can be linked to the wrong form of criticism. Being lifted up with pride can make us think we know better than others. This is self-righteousness.

Such an attitude is the opposite of what God wants. Romans 12:3 instructs each individual “not to think of himself more highly than he ought.”

When we get exalted in our own minds, we naturally overemphasize the faults of others. We think we know better. These attitudes can express themselves against our employers, government leaders and the ministry.

Proverbs 6 mentions a “lying tongue.” Critical comments often warp and twist the facts. Said another way, it is lying.

Criticism may begin in a person’s heart, but it always wants to be shared (Matt. 12:34).

Judging others and talking about it has a name: Sowing division, or discord, among brethren. God’s Word is clear about how to deal with those who cause division in the Church: “Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offenses contrary to the doctrine which you have learned; and avoid them” (Rom. 16:17).

Similarly, II Thessalonians 3:6 tells Christians to “withdraw yourselves from every brother that walks disorderly, and not after the tradition which he received of us.”

Bible Example

An account from Moses’ life makes even clearer how God feels about sinful criticism. Miriam and Aaron had begun to think too highly of themselves and found fault with their younger brother.

Numbers 12:1 states that “Miriam and Aaron spoke against Moses…” Why? Because he had married an Ethiopian woman sometime in the past. Using this misstep as a reason to criticize him, they arrogantly proclaimed: “Has the Lord indeed spoken only by Moses? Has He not spoken also by us?” (vs. 2).

In other words, they said: “Moses isn’t the only one God is working through. He is working through us too. We should have as much say in matters as he does. We can do the job just as well—or better!”

But this was not said in a vacuum: “And the Lord heard it” (vs. 2).

God immediately addressed the issue in verse 4: “And the Lord spoke suddenly unto Moses, and unto Aaron, and unto Miriam, Come out you three unto the tabernacle of the congregation. And they three came out.”

In the following verses, God makes plain that He gave Moses his leadership role: “With him [Moses] will I speak mouth to mouth, even apparently, and not in dark speeches; and the similitude of the Lord shall he behold: wherefore then were you not afraid to speak against My servant Moses?” (vs. 8).

The result? “The anger of the Lord was kindled against them” (vs. 9). Miriam was afflicted with leprosy as punishment—likely because she instigated the conversation. Moses then cried out to God, and it only lasted seven days.

In this account, God was protecting the government He had put in place. He did not want anyone to speak against His chosen leader, Moses.

But there was another reason God acted so quickly. He knows that criticism and judgmental attitudes can spread like wildfire. They must be immediately stamped out while just a spark in dry grass.

This is why we as God’s people must avoid the sinful form of criticism in every aspect of our lives: Spouse against spouse, children against parents, brethren against brethren, and so on. Being a criticizer in these areas will ultimately grow into a crippling spiritual problem.

The Core Cause

If being critical is so destructive, why do people fall into it?

For one, it feels good in the short term. Pointing out flaws and belittling others inflates faultfinders’ self-worth. “I am not as bad as them,” they think.

Being adversarial can also be an attempt to hide weaknesses by drawing attention to the real or perceived weaknesses of others. Often, this is done because a person knows he or she is doing something wrong—and does not want others to find out. For example, if they are lazy in their job performance, they will often point out problems in others to divert attention away from themselves.

Finally, criticism can be used to feel superior. It can make the individual dishing out judgment feel more knowledgeable, accomplished and just plain better than everyone else.

These all have the same thing in common: pride.

As “prince of the power of the air” (Eph. 2:2), Satan the devil injects his critical, adversarial thoughts into the minds of everyone on Earth. His nature influences human nature.

The Bible shows how the devil’s rebellious streak grew. God created him as Lucifer and made him “full of wisdom” and “perfect in beauty” (Ezek. 28:12). Yet Satan did not stay that way. He eventually began to question, second-guess and disagree with the way God was doing things. He was convinced he had a better way.

Lucifer developed an attitude of criticism. Subtly voicing his negative thoughts to others, he turned one-third of the angels against their Creator (Rev. 12:4).

The sinful attitude grew until it had utterly corrupted the archangel’s mind. He then attempted to seize God’s throne, power and authority. He said: “I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars [angels] of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north: I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High” (Isa. 14:13-14).

Of course, his insane plot failed (Ezek. 28:16; Isa. 14:12), but his poisonous, accusative attitude remains at the core of his thinking.

The devil today is the ultimate adversary of God and every true Christian. He is critical of everything God does—and vehemently attacks His Church, Work and people.

Fight It!

God hates critical attitudes and everything that stems from them. Satan wants to inject rotten, judgmental thoughts into our minds. So how do we avoid succumbing?

The first step is to remain humble. We must remember that we are only human and should not have an outsized view of ourselves. This will allow God to use us and help us see ourselves for who we really are. As James 4:6 says, “God resists the proud, but gives grace unto the humble.”

Verse 7 adds: “Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.”

If we ever find ourselves becoming overly critical of others, we should instead focus on ourselves. Philippians 2:12 instructs, “work out your own salvation with fear and trembling.” Do not let a misplaced focus on others distract you from your own eternal well-being.

Humble, self-reflective attitudes will help us when we need to lovingly point out an area where someone is falling short.

Matthew 7 is instructive here. It tells us to worry about the huge beam in our own eye before helping someone with the mote in his or her eye (vs. 3-5). We may have proverbial 2x4 pieces of wood stuck in our eyeballs and should work to remove those before trying to get a piece of wood dust out of someone else’s. The message is clear: Work on your own big problems before attempting to help others with their smaller ones.

Some of us who are naturally more critical will have to be even more vigilant. Often people who struggle with low self-esteem and perfectionism fall into this camp. If you grew up in an especially critical household, beware!

II Timothy gives us some of the antidotes to being a faultfinder. While it is written specifically about ministers, it holds lessons for everyone: “And the servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient, in meekness instructing those that oppose themselves…” (2:24-25).

“Strive” here means to start a war of words. Critical comments often kick off such exchanges! The remedy here is to be gentle, patient and meek. These are all fruits of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23). Ask God to grow these characteristics in you as you root out negativity.

Finally, with those who have authority over us, we must never become overly familiar. There is a reason we have a tradition in the Church to call ministers and their wives “Mr.” and “Mrs.” It serves as a reminder to show respect for the role God has given each individual in the Body of Christ.

James 3:1 is helpful to keep in mind: “My brethren, be not many masters, knowing that we shall receive the greater condemnation.” Those with more authority will have more to account for to God for their decisions.

Similarly, we must honor national leaders and our employers: “Honor all men. Love the brotherhood. Fear God. Honor the king. Servants, be subject to your masters with all fear; not only to the good and gentle, but also to the froward” (I Pet. 2:17-18).

Always remember that God is the one who has given them these positions: “Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resists the power, resists the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation” (Rom. 13:1-2).

Be especially careful anytime you speak about those in authority.

Pull Yourself Back

Recall that self-righteousness and negative criticism go hand in hand. The classic story of self-righteousness in the Bible is that of Job. God was trying to show him for many chapters how he was off base. But it did not dawn on Job that he was wrong.

That is until chapter 40, when God asked: “Shall a faultfinder contend with the Almighty? He who argues with God, let him answer it” (Job 40:2, Revised Standard Version).

Job had unknowingly become a faultfinder—someone who criticizes and judges others. Someone who argues with God.

It was at this moment that Job realized he was wrong. He answered: “Behold, I am of small account; what shall I answer You? I lay my hand on my mouth. I have spoken once, and I will not answer; twice, but I will proceed no further” (vs. 4-5, RSV).

This servant of God suddenly realized he had said too much already and put his hand over his mouth. He stayed quiet, listened and learned his lesson.

We should constantly look for signs that we are becoming faultfinders. As with Job, it can sneak up on us.

Never forget the utter devastation that comes from a critical attitude. If you ever find negative, judgmental words coming out of your mouth—stop!! It is time to humble yourself and examine how you got to that place.